viva las vegas!

trip goals:
see an elvis impersentor
see someone famous
see a wedding at a wedding chapel

happenings:
1.     took 15 minutes to pack the car because we had too much luggage, 
        check.
2.     broke a sweat at 8a.m. because of dumb humidity in alabama, check.
3.     parked as far away as possible from our terminal at the airport, check.
4.     sat in front of really loud talkers on a plane for 4 hours, check.
5.    changed the ring on my phone to what sounds like slot machines, check.
6.    missed several phone calls at the las vegas airport thinking it was real 
        slot machines, check.
7.    went to lunch at surf city bar and grill where allie works and met some of
         her regular customers, check.
8.     bought some brazil impanema coffee beans and a las vegas coffee mug at
         starbucks, check.
9.     ate new york style italian at new york, new york, check.
10.   walked down the strip to see the water light show at the bellagio, check.
11.    got bombarded by people passing out invitations to strip clubs with
          naked women on them, check.
12.   got so grossed out by the sketchiness on the strip i felt like vomitting,
         check.
13.   slept late, check.
14.   lunch at lake las vegas, check. 
15.   drove to the hoover dam, check.
16.   was in nevada, crossed into arizona, then back to nevada, check.
17.   went grocery shopping, check.
18.   decided i didn’t like the las vegas mug i bought so i bought another one, 
         check.
19.   double double animal style at in n’ out burger, check.
20.  oatmeal chocolate chip cookies and dan in real life, check.
21.   massages at the spa at lakeside, check.
22.   lunch on the patio at a french bistro, check.
23.   starbucks run for 2 iced venti sweetened passion teas and 1 iced venti
          soy latte, check.
24.   drove through red rock canyon, check.
25.   almost peed my pants on the way home thanks to #23, check.
26.   nap time, check.
27.  dinner in downtown old las vegas, check.
28.  walked down freemont street and saw lots of crazy looking people,
         check.
29.  saw people dancing to the psychedelic light show that included music
         from queen and the beatles, check. 
30.  bought cheesy souveniours, check. 
31.   slept super late, check.
32.  read “the friday night knitting club” and drank 3 cups of brazil 
         impanema, check.
33.  declared brazil impanema as the best coffee in the world, check. 
34.  saw my first wedding chapel, check.
35.  took pictures in front of the “welcome to fabulous las vegas” sign, check.
36.   went to dinner at the venetian hotel, check.
37.  walked around and saw gondala rides inside the venetian hotel, check.
38.  went to serendipity 3 outside caears’s palace and had a peanut butter
         frozen hot chocolate, check.
39.  walked through caesar’s palace and got my picture taken with caesar, 
        check. 
40.  laughed about one of my favorite friends’ episodes that takes place at
        casesar’s palace, check.   
41.  while waiting for our car from the valet saw 2 girls hanging out of the
        sunroof , yelling and dancing with each other, while some schmuck 
        drove them around in circles in front of caesar’s palace, check.
42.  named those people the most ignorant people of the trip so far, check.
43.  thought about hanging out allie’s sunroof and giving the people a good
         laugh by making fun of those girls, check. 
44.  got on the 15 headed back to allie’s and saw the ignorant people on the
         freeway still hanging out the sunroof and tried to take a picture, check.
45.  slept late again, check.
46.  went shopping and got some essentials and non-essentials, check.
47.  bought allie some birthday gifts, check.
48.  planned a small suprise party for allie’s birthday, check.
49.  went to dinner at a fancy schmancy restaraunt with mom, allie, her best
         friend ashley and her precious 15 month old daughter cady, check.
50.  good time had by all, check.
51.  talked a little, cried a little, slept a little, check.
52.  caught an early flight back to birmingham, check.
53.  miss allie, don’t miss vegas so much, check. check. 

trip goals accomplised:
none=boo!

 

inquiring minds

last wednesday thru sunday my family went to greenville, n.c. for my cousin kathryn’s wedding. we got to see almost all of my mom’s side of the family. it was fun seeing everyone because it has been years since i have seen them!  these are some of the funniest moments from the weekend:

it is almost a sure bet that when the family gets together, atleast one of the aunts is going to want to know who is getting married next. on the way from raleigh to greenville, i declared that if anyone asked me when i was getting married i would punch them in the face.  my family decided it would be more comical if we each had reasons why the next to marry wouldn’t be us, so if anyone asked…i would tell them i had chosen a gay lifestyle, allie would say she believed in pologomy and taking many husbands, and todd would say he has chosen a life of celibacy.  so we had our alibis if anyone prodded.  but of course, inquiring minds want to know….the following is the conversation i had with my 10 year old cousin, caroline

caroline: are you married
me: no
caroline: how old are you?
me: 30
caroline:  WOW

and no i did not punch her in the face or tell her i was gay. leave it to a 10 year old to make you feel awesome about being single.

caroline was kinda obsessed with trying to make todd talk to her and make him laugh or smile.  good luck with that, i’ve been trying for years.

caroline: why is todd so quiet?
me: i don’t know
caroline: i know why.
me: really, why?
caroline: 1.  he gets it from uncle ebbie.  2. he wants to be that way.  3. there’s just somethin’ in that wine! (said in the sassiest and cutest little georgia accent ever) 

i have recently been obsessed with this mad tv skit and quoting it like crazy. just so happens, caroline(10) and brooklyn(6) watch it as often as i do and knew every single word. they were hilarious!

also an awkwardly funny moment at the wedding…..the band was playing and my dad asked me to dance, which was really sweet, however the song they were playing was “let’s get it on” so i freaked out and yelled that was sick and gross and i was not dancing with him. my dad wasn’t even paying attention and didn’t know that was the song playing.  i think i embarrassed him because i flipped out. i apologize again dad, but really?  gross. if it had been any other song, i totally would have danced with him.

 

hobbie lobby

i feel like hobbies have been non-existent lately in my life. mostly because there is a lack of time and/or money, but if i had more time and/or money, these are hobbies i would like to take up and get good at. most of these are really cheap, especially once you get involved after you’ve purchased the basics…if only there were the time…

sewing

knitting

crochetting

ceramics

calligraphy

photography

playing the guitar

playing the drums

gardening

painting

reading (without falling asleep after 15 minutes)

learning hebrew

learning italian

 

lori needs

i decided to do this little google search that tracie posted on her blog  last week. basically you go to google.com and type in “lori (insert your name here) needs”
these are a few of the responses i found.

lori needs:
our help
friends
new friends
to vent

uh, what the junk? this was not funny, it is the most depressing thing i’ve done all day. google search sucks.

 

crazy mike

last year when i worked at starbucks 280 we had a customer that the partners referred to as ”crazy mike”.  he would come through the drive thru and order a venti white mocha with like 7 shots of espresso in it, but before he drove up to the window he would yell “and stir the hell out of it!!!!!!!!!” in his good ole’ boy southern accent.  well today i went to a local auto place to have an oil change and inspection done.  when i was standing in line the guy that was helping me said something to his coworker about his starbucks cup and was making fun of him for drinking a $5 cup of coffee.  so the guy replied. “ha! i wish my drink were $5, it costs me like $7.” and I was thinking what in the world is this guy drinking??? then I looked at him and was like omg it is crazy mike.  even though i haven’t worked there in over a year, i was pretty sure it was him. just then the phone rang and he answered it…”this is mike.” seriously????? made my day kinda funny. then after the inspection he told me all $2300 worth of things they thought shoud be done to my car.  um, that is crazy, mike.   i should have piped up and been like “i serve that $5 coffee daily and i will give you your $7 drink free everyday for the rest of your life in return for fixing my car.” but i didn’t. moment passed. doubtful it  would have worked anyways, and also i think it is like illegal or something. or atleast against starbucks policy. 

also while at the local auto place, i was listening to other customer conversations while waiting.  (believe me, i was trying to read my book, but these people were very loud and distracting.)  
lady#1 to crazy mike: no i am going back to work i will come back and get my car….
lady#2 to lady #1: hhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ohhhhhhhhh myyyyyyyyy goddddddddddddddddd what are you doing here???????? oh my god oh my god i haven’t seen you in sooooooo long. how are you??????????????
lady #1 to lady #2: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh oh my god!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! heeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyy
lady #1 to lady #2: how are you? are you still married?
lady #2 to lady #1: well, you know i married so and so and then we got divorced.
awkwarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrd pause
lady #2 to lady #1: well i saw so and so the other day and you know he and such and such….uh huh…..can you believe it?
gossip gossip blah blah blah
lady #1 turns to the man who is with her and asks lady #2 if she has met him
lady # 2: no! hi! soooooooo are y’all toge…???????? ughhhhh friends? old friends? okay well good. okay.
soooooooooooooooooo awkward. my back was turned so i could only hear them. i REALLY wish i could have seen the facial expressions at this point.  lady #1 finally leaves….and lady #2 can attend to business…..
lady #2 to crazy mike: i need two new tires
crazy mike to lady #2: okay this is what your options are…..
lady #2 to crazy mike: okay what all is involved in this?
crazy mike to lady #2: ugh…….we take your tires off and give you new ones???
ummmmmmmmmmmm really?????  who says “so are you still married?” and who asks what is involved in getting new tires put on a car? i just don’t understand. as annoyed as i was that they were distracting me from my book, i willl admit i was very entertained by their conversations and obliviousness to others.  it really makes you think about what you say that other people may hear. i know people hear conversations i have all the time and probably think the same about me.  that’s cool. sometimes it is fun to say stuff just so they think you are a complete loo-loo.

the end.

 

season

 

there is a time for everything, 
and a season for every activity under heaven: 
a time to be born and a time to die, 
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal, 
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh, 
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, 
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up, 
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend, 
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate, 
a time for war and a time for peace.
what does the worker gain from his toil?  i have seen the burden God has laid on men.  He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.   
ecclesiastes 3:1-11

1season n  1:one of the divisions of the year (as spring or summer) 2: a special period

i am in this place in my life that i don’t even have words to desribe.  i have been here, in this season for a while.  sometimes i think about how long and i get really frustrated.  i then have to remind myself that although i am not where i want to be, i am a lot further from where i was. i know, that is so cliche, but it is so true.   and still, i feel like i am in that same season.  there are a few things i have desired for years that i have not yet come to pass.  i am of course referring to the american dream…getting married, having children, and being able to not live paycheck to paycheck.  when i was younger i felt a little foolish getting upset about stuff like that because i thought, i’m young, this is part of life, everyone goes through it and these things they will come…well, it’s years and years and years and years (plus a few more) later and i am still waiting.  for the same things i was waiting for 8 years ago.  and it’s hard.  but what is harder than that is being surrounded by people my age and younger who have the things i so desire.  and it’s not even because i am jealous of them and bitter that it hasn’t happened for me yet, so much as it just makes me feel totally and completely inadequate. i feel like there was a boat and i missed it.  i feel like i am stages behind.  20something year olds are married with kids(PLURAL) and i don’t even have a boyfriend.  it’s like i graduated college and forgot to get a job, get married, and have kids.  and thanks to society, i.e. living in the south, people can make you feel like there is something wrong with  you because didn’t marry your college sweetheart a month after graduation.  now, i just want to say despite the way i FEEL….i KNOW God loves me, i KNOW He has a plan and a purpose for my life, i KNOW His hand is on me, His presence is in my life, He continues to provide for me all the time, i KNOW that i am abundantly blessed and He extends His grace on me every single day and i am gratfeul for it.  i’m not telling you blog readers anything i have not told the Lord.  often i cry out in the words of david ”give ear to my words, o Lord, consider my sighing.  listen to my cry for help, my King and my God, for to you i pray.  in the morning, o Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning i lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.” psalm 5:1-3 

2season vb 1: to make pleasant to the taste by use of salt, pepper, or spices 2: to make (as by aging or drying) suitable for use 3: to accustom or habituate to something (as hardship) syn harden, inure, acclimatize, toughen 

while looking up the definition of season the noun, i came across the definition of season the verb.  the two coincide.  i have been questioning my season all day.  i have been crying for hours. my eyes are swollen and i can’t breathe. it is way past my bedtime.  and this simple thought has calmed me. it has given me peace and hope…
i am the verb, inside the noun.

p.s. i don’t want any funny comments about aging or drying me to make me suitable for use!!!

 

summer faves

sadly this summer has not included all the things on this list, but oh well. here’s to next summer…..

fresh squeezed homemade lemonade
the beach
pepper place farmer’s market
the lake
outdoor concerts
homemade peach ice cream
lighter traffic
iced caramel macchiatos
road trips
flip flops
cookouts
memorial day
4th of july
labor day
countdown to college football
working on my tan

what are your summer faves???

 

morning thought process

most mornings i open at starbucks, which means that most mornings my alarm clock goes off at 4:30a.m. which usually leads to these thoughts on any given morning in no particular order…

what the?????????????????????????
it is still dark outside.
there is no reason i should be awake right now.
maybe i can sleep a few more minutes.
i hate starbucks.
i hate coffee.
who seriously needs to drink coffee so early in the stupid morning?
i hate my life.
i hate everything.
whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?????????????????????????????????????????????????
what if i didn’t go today?
atleast i can take a nap later.
no one should ever be up this early.
why didn’t i go to bed earlier.
i don’t care about makeup or my hair or what i look like.
i want to sleep forever.
stupid. stupid. stupid. stupid.
dumb. dumb. dumb. dumb.

usually by the time we open at 6:00a.m. my only thoughts include:
coffee.
coffee.
coffee.
coffee.
coffee.
coffee.

 

freaks in the drive thru

sometimes i see some interesting characters at starbucks. actually, a lot of our regular customers are probably some of the weirdest people i have met. we have a lot of amazing customers too, but it is the weird ones that can make or break your day if you let them! however, most of the time it is just pretty entertaining to me~

so yesterday i worked 5:30a.m.-1:00p.m. it started out pretty normal and then several things happened that were just so weird i am still laughing about them.

1.  this lady orders a tall, soy, no foam, latte. she is foreign and i can’t really understand what she is saying to me at the window so i am just smiling and being polite.  i hand her drink out the window to her. i leave the window open and turn around, thinking i am about to greet the next customer because she should have already driven off, and she is sitting there, holding her finger up with foam on it, wagging it around and yells at me “i said NO FOAMMMMMMMM” so i offer to re-make her drink and she says no and drives off. so basically she has stuck her finger in her latte and then wagged it at me. this has given all new meaning to the “foam finger” for me.

2.  ”thanks for choosing starbucks, this is lori, what can i get started for you today?” the answer should be pretty easy, right? not for this guy. he couldn’t even tell me what he wanted to order, made no sense whatsoever, and sounded like he was high. so i finally figure out what he wants and he pulls around to the window. i walk over and he is wearing no shirt and now he not only sounds high, he also looks high as well.  i hand out the drinks and am reaching out to give him his money and see his bare legs and look up at his shirtless self and realize i can’t see any clothes on this man. if he is wearing shorts, they are so short they cannot be seen and so i really don’t know if he was wearing any clothes at all.  i am a little concerned about this and then as if things couldn’t get weirder, the passenger, who is wearing a tuxedo, leans forward and it is a girl. so i have  a potentially naked, high man driving the car and a woman in a tuxedo in the passenger seat. ummmmmmm??? they came back through the drive thru today and i had the pleasure of other people seeing them and understanding exactly what i was talking about so they know i am not making it up. why would i even make it up? and yes, today he still looked naked and she was not wearing a tux but was wearing a suit and tie….

3. working at starbucks, you are supposed to connect with customers. so i ask the lady how she is doing. big mistake. this is basically the dialouge….”oh i’m okay. well not really that good. i just found out i have to have knee surgery next week, so i am treating myself today (to the sweet tea she ordered. all i am saying is, if i was treating myself, it would be to like cake or something. not sweet tea. but whatev i digress…) because i am really anxious about it. my last surgery didn’t go that well. actually the last 2 they didn’t really repair what they were supposed to. this will be the 3rd knee surgery in 3 years. i hope that my new doctor is good. i hear he is a good doctor, but he is a jerk. he told me i was fat. my husband said he could have said it nicer, he could have told me i was a little overweight and it is bad for my knees, but he didn’t. he just looked at me and said you are fat. my hairdresser said he is mean because he has a small “you know what” (and yes, she pointed down there as she said it.)”  i have long handed this lady her drink and her money and she is still talking while the drive thru line is growing….so finally she starts driving off and is looking back at me and yelling out her window “he is such a jerk but it’s probably just because he has a small “you know what”!!!!!!!!”

ummmmmmmmm really?

 

israel 101

i floated in the dead sea, i swam in the sea of galilee, i tried to picture Jesus walking on that same water, i looked up at the stars and thought about how Jesus probably did the same, i saw the isaiah scrolls, i left some things on an altar in qumran, i understand the impact of the holocaust on a whole new level, i walked the old city of jerusalem, i walked in the steps of Jesus, i met an orthodox jew who is searching for truth and i believe he is going to find it, i saw the site where the Lord was crucified, i went in His tomb, i saw where He is going to come back, i saw the place where armaggedeon is going to take place, i walked in the field where david killed goliath, i sifted through rubble and ruins of the old Temple to prove it existed,  i worshipped the Living God under a full moon and a blanket of stars in the desert, i went to petra in jordan, i saw how a new holocaust is slowly happening to the jewish people, i prayer walked around condeleeza rice’s hotel in hopes she will make the right decisions regarding israel for the usa’s sake, i prayed with beautiful women at the western wall, i got as close to the holy of holies as i could get, i met the most precious man from the golan, i found sea glass and pottery  in the mediterranean, i got to spend 2 weeks with friends-old and new, i learned a little hebrew, i got baptized in the jordan, i learned why they call it the red sea, i had confirmation from the Lord, i felt His presence everywhere, i know why He loves israel so much, now i love israel so much, my life will never be the same, i am making plans to go back next year, i can’t wait, ps. 122:6-9